I've Had Worse...

So at a new place for a month which I will have to say after the first night there, wasn't my most brilliant decision. I took it from a friend of a friend hastily without really checking into it all that well. Granted it is safe and in a pretty neighborhood. However, the room faces the street and is directly above a bar. Yup, and it doesn't take into consideration the neighbors. Houseguests? Lets see, one is a lesbian with a kid going through a break up. She is very nice and "granola". She has the oddest piercing thought. She has her waddle pierced. I don't know why she would punch a hole through the fat in her neck right about where an Adam's Apple would be, but to each their own. Maybe I am getting conservative in my old age but seeing that is some freaky ass shit. The other houseguest is bar manager, who is apparently deaf. And, likes to watch movies full volume when he comes home. Last night was that trainwreck of a movie with Sarah Jessica Parker visiting her new inlaws. From what I heard it isn't all that good. Well, then again I've slept between dumpsters, so this is luxury. I think. Not so much.

Last night I tried to cook dinner for these two kids I always see coming off the subway. They are soooo mangy and skinny I start hyperventilating when I see them. There they are strummin' their guitar holding up a sign that reads "Hungry Homeless Hobos". Catchy, huh? Well here I was all ready to cook up a storm and then...I walked into one of the nastiest, dirtiest kitchens I have ever seen. I mean soup kitchens are classier. So instead of cooking and contributing to the world as a whole I spent 3 freaking hours cleansing and disinfecting. Don't even ask me about the bathtub. That was an additional hour of scrubbing. Then I called the nation hotline for gays and lesbians and proceeded to inform the operator of the atrocities of my temporary pad. They will be sending a investigative squad to make sure the 'mos in the house actually deserve their cards. They should have all their princess points taken away!

So, after hours of cleaning, and dreading the ride back into the city on the subway I began to realize I have started to become an elitest snob. Critical Charlie I was last night. No living outside of Manhattan, or with dirty people, or in a room that won't be able to hold my queen size bed. Is that wrong? No I don't think so. Well, I suppose I will be able to cook up something for the homeless boys tonight. I hope. Unless the new roomies screw something else up.